by B. L. Gilmore

© 1991 B. L. Gilmore

I wondered if I could figure out exactly when I had lost my sanity as I wound the matching-colored wires around each other, pretending to be some sort of electrical technician. I had no idea how it worked, I just knew how to follow instructions, and make the job look neat.

Of course, I had called almost every hardware store in the county before starting the job, to make sure I had the right parts and to help my self-confidence, should I need to answer any questions by onlookers.

It all started when the bathroom light wouldn’t light up. No problem, I thought, as I snatched the box labeled "light bulbs."

But, that wasn’t it. The room remained dark.

"OK," I said to myself, as I moved even more boxes aside in the garage to clear the door of the fuse panel. Circuit breakers. Each one checks out fine. Great.

"So, what’s next?" my husband asks me. I try not to let him see me think, just as I spot the "circuit-breaker-that-looks-like-an-outlet." Some people refer to it as a GFP, or ground fault protector.

Press the reset button, and….Bravo! There is light once again in the bathroom, and I no longer have to explain how to take a shower by flashlight.

See, in my household, I am the one who wears the overalls. Not the pants in the family, but the overalls, for, you know, repair work.

There must be something that can be said for do-it-yourselfers, besides "Ouch," and "I told you to call a repairman," but I haven’t quite figured it out yet.

As it happened, within moments, we were in the dark again, literally. The reset button wouldn’t stay reset, and the search began the following morning for the part that I had yet to get the correct terminology for.

Relieved to find it cost a reasonable amount (less than $20), I went to work on installation.

Naturally, the job began, through circumstances beyond my control, after dark. As I walked past the TV, the main character on Home Improvements was demonstrating the correct way to install an electrical socket. Sparks flew as he played the part of a man getting electrocuted.

I gave myself one more chance to chicken out, but decided to forge ahead.

Flashlight in hand, I dove into the uncharted task before me. It was much simpler than I had feared, although I wondered what in the world made me think I could do this, and then felt a small sense of pride when the job was done.

The bathroom light glared, and I sat back, thinking of how I had conquered yet one more obstacle this house had set before me.

But before I could really appreciate the moment, the sound of running water caught my attention. No faucets were on, yet I could hear the water going through the pipes in the wall. It has that distinct sound, you know. I wondered how I would do as a plumber as I began to walk with my ear to the wall, becoming more intrigued with each moment.

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